A parent from North Carolina is furious after their children’s school leaked information that revealed the 6-year-old twins are being raised in a gender-nonconforming home, leading to an online campaign of hate against the family.
Gender-Nonconforming
Mortellus, a trans nonbinary parent, is raising twins in a gender-nonconforming household without the traditional binary restrictions commonly seen in society.
Family Dynamics
The twins, referred to as Sun and Moon, are allowed to explore their identities freely, with Sun identifying as “she/her” and Moon as a “girl/them” and enjoying life without gender constraints.
Children’s Personalities
Sun is described as a math enthusiast, while Moon aspires to be an astronaut, and Mortellus says they find a lot of joy in their children’s freedom to explore their identities and interests.
When Mortellus first enrolled their children in the charter school, they even asked about gender-neutral bathrooms but found they had no family gender-neutral bathrooms.
Unfortunately for Mortellus, the children’s gender identities were leaked to a parent, which has led to a community backlash online from parents speaking out against the family.
At a school board meeting, many parents spoke out about the issue and expressed concerns over safety and confusion over the family.
At the school board meeting, one parent even went so far as calling the family’s belief and lifestyle “satanic,” with only one parent stepping up to the plate and defending the family.
Unsurprisingly, leaked information and subsequent blowback have left Mortellus worrying that their children were put in danger and upset and that the school did not inform them about the incident.
Mortellus said, “I felt nauseous. I felt sad. I battled with myself over what the right reaction was… but I settled on anger. They’d all put my children in danger, and the school had done nothing to make us aware.”
Mortellus has since refuted claims that they are making demands at the school, stating their intent was only to ensure their children received equal support and protection.
Marcellus said, “There has been an assumption that I walked in the doors of the school like a cartoon villain shouting HERE ARE MY DEMANDS — but that’s not true at all.”
Addressing Misconceptions
Critics also say Mortellus’ children are too young to explore their gender identity, but Mortellus feels children can have a strong sense of gender identity at a very young age.
Mortellus says, “In terms of simple child development, we know that children have a pretty strong idea of gender identity as early as three.”
Mortellus also pointed out the societal double standards where heteronormative binaries are accepted without question, but non-traditional families are subject to scrutiny and villainization.
Despite the controversy, Mortellus continues to advocate for their family’s rights and hopes to ensure their children can grow up without societal pressures on their identity.
Sharing their experience, Mortellus says, “The most joyful thing in the world to me is looking at either of those kids and just knowing that they’re living their best life and getting to explore who they are. So few people get that opportunity, and I’m so happy that they get to have it.”
Unfortunately, it seems that forced outings like this are far from rare inside the American school system as parents across the country continue to find out that their children’s personal identity has not been respected at school.
Research shows that forced outings can lead to increased depressive symptoms and lower family support for LGBTQ+ youth, whereas affirmation and support from parents will often mitigate these negative effects.
Aloe Johnson, who works at the Family and Community Services Director at Resource Center, commented on situations like these and highlighted the harmful debates these kinds of outings can lead to for children.
Johnson said, “Queer youth hear these conversations, and it is very damaging to have their humanity being debated.”
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Structured Vision.
